If you read this journal,
even if I don’t speak to you often,
post a memory of me.
It can be anything you want.
It can be good or bad,
just so long as it happened.

Then post this on your journal.
Be surprised and see what people remember about you.

Bukas na.

I don’t think I’ll sleep a wink.

**********

Man. I’m rather pleased with my grades.

It was card-giving earlier today, so, yeah, I went to school. Haha. Made tambay with Pate, Estelle, Marielle, Alvin, Ada, etc. Dami eh. XD

Then at around 12:30-ish, we had our batch pic. Under the sun. Let me just say that it was a rather horrible experience, being baked under the heat of the summer sun and all. Ugh, nasty, I tell you. You could even hear the teachers complaining about it.

Then the stampede going to the classroom. Haha. I think Sir Martin was pulling my leg when he told me (last Thursday) that my Bio grade went down — it retained. My Chem grade went down, though — but my average is still the same.

Haha.

**********

And let me just say that I am just so darn… excited now. Heh.

Hmm. I think I’ll just read the night away.

—————-
Now playing on iTunes: Snow Patrol – Signal Fire

…felt that a friend of yours is someone you knew?

Just a thought.

Dammit. I miss you.

Time flies quickly if you’re having fun.

Indeed, it does. Who ever thought that I’d actually enjoy myself this year, despite the workload?

But then again, if you’re with Dahlia, it seems inevitable. After all, we have fun most of the time — so much fun that it seems toxic.

I must admit, I was rather reluctant to blend in at first. After the familiarity I’ve felt with my first year classmates, it felt different to be suddenly uprooted and forced to be with people I didn’t know. Change was something that was unavoidable, but undesired. I was content. I wanted to stick to the status quo, so to speak.

But then, I realized, if I didn’t even try to blend in, I would definitely miss out on a lot of things. I’d miss out on all the fun. I’d probably be an extremely grade-conscious, paranoid recluse. And that’s another change if it happened, seeing as I’m not an introvert.

So I relaxed and joined in the fun. And it’s a decision I’ll never regret. I’ve made a lot of friends, I learned to deal with an assortment of characters, eccentricities, and idiosyncrasies

I may not be as close to them as I was to Garnet, but they’re still endearing to me.  After all, they’re the ones who go through the same hell as I do — academics-wise. And our wide range of personalities complement each other well — something that’s a bit of a miracle, if you ask me.

I’ll never forget Dahlia.

You know, these past few days, I haven’t been writing in my journal (yes, I do keep one). Not because I’ve lost the will to write, but because my journal just… died on me.

Ran out of pages, actually.

Which means I seriously need to go to Powerbooks and buy another one.

In the meantime, though, I’ve been scribbling my thoughts on — guess what. My Bio notebook (sorry, Ma’am Dacs!). I would’ve gladly used my Algebra notebook, except that it’s almost full. Plus, I bring my Bio notebook everyday — a definite plus for me.

Anyway, life — let’s just say it’s been not-so kind to me. No, I am not burdened with LOADS of problems, my dear, but let’s just say this line from Rent suits me right now:

How do you leave the past behind when it keeps finding ways to get to your heart?

Yes, yes, yes, my past is catching up on me. Some, in good ways — just today, AK (an old friend of mine from grade school) posted a message in my Multiply, asking if I was up for a reunion. My answer? Why not?

However, it’s been catching up on me negatively too. This, I won’t really talk about here, but let’s just say it involves a certain subject. Yeah. (If you know me REALLY well, you might know what I’m talking about.)

Then, there’s another rather emo-inducing thing that’s getting to me lately. I’m blaming Boston Legal (we had to watch this for English) for provoking me. Yes, that episode with the Wiccans and stuff about Halloween.

Because Lifehouse’s You and Me just brings back memories. Shit.

School? One word: STRESS.

Haha.

And, seriously, only two weeks left? Holy crap.

…wow. I actually miss posting here.

—————-
Listening to: Lifehouse – You And Me

Okay, it’s TWO days after V-Day. And yeah, it was fine, really. (No, I’m not being bitter.)

And I was happy. Finally — I was sad last Valentines’, you know. This year’s Valentines’ was a far cry from that.

And since I’m too lazy to elaborate, some random thoughts.

• I didn’t give him anything for Valentines’. But that’s fine — less drama. Besides, I don’t need to give him anything to show how much I care for him.
• FebEx rocks. Even though I didn’t give anything. Oh, but I got something. A card. Yeah. There.
• Roses, even though they’re wilted, cause kilig overdrives.
• I hate hate hate SocSci. Why PLO? Why? O_O
• Masaya yumakap ng mga teacher. Seriously.
• The best magturo si Athena ng Chem. I mean, “Why did the white bear dissolve in water? Because it’s polar!” Yeah. Corny Chem jokes rock. And “Alfred, kukurutin na kita!” FTW.
• The field is the best place for talking. Okay, make that the oval. God, it was so cool out there — there was a really cool breeze blowing, and it wasn’t hot.
• Kung wala kang blackboard, sa oval ka pumunta. Kung wala kang chalk, okay lang. May bato naman.
• Lance is the best Geom teacher EVER. Haha.
• The best rin magturo ng Bio sina Gorio at Marv.
• Bakit hindi pumasok si Orate?!?
• Gusto ko ng chocolate. At roses.
• Masyado nang maraming alam si Alvin. Oops.

Okay. Random much. But it really was enjoyable — probably the best Valentines’ Day I’ve ever had. ^_^

So, yeah, I was browsing through my first WordPress blog a few minutes ago, and I read this entry of mine I wrote back in first year.

Love, oh, love. It’s such a poisonous beautiful four letter word, a word that can turn an entire world upside down. It can create bridges connecting two people and once this bridge is created, it’s such an engineering marvel.

And yet love can be a sword. It can hurt you and you’ll end up writhing in pain. Like I said in my previous post about love, it is bittersweet. There are moments of happiness and there are moments of sorrow, of agony.

But then you’ll still go for it, because you know love isn’t worthless. It’s priceless. It can never go to waste for even though the person you love so much doesn’t reciprocate that love back to you, he/she still knows that someone out there cares for him/her. That’s what counts, really, although it hurts when that love isn’t returned to you.

If that happens to you, don’t give up. Wait, be patient, persevere. Although it may not be a happy ending for you, at least you know that you did your best. You tried.

There’s something about the pain caused by loving someone that makes you come back for more of it. I don’t know exactly what but it is true. Maybe it’s because you’re sacrificing your happiness just so that another person can be happy. Maybe it’s because you’re getting out of your comfort zone just because you want that person to be comfortable. It’s all about giving.

I know I sound philosophical here, but, think about it.

God. Was I that cheesy and disillusioned back then? Well, admittedly, I still see my world in rose-tinted shades, but not as much as before. Besides, I still quite agree with what I wrote — except that it actually makes me cringe now.

Funny, I’m posting this a few days from Valentines. Really.

And you know what? I don’t give much of a damn anymore.

—————-
Listening to: Eric Clapton – Change the World

Fudge.

Achievement tests tomorrow.

I will die.

Wait. I can’t die yet — I’ll still have to shop. XD

And you know, the year passed by so quickly. Gah. I mean… it’s almost the end of second year.

And you know what? I’m actually gonna miss Dahlia so much.

*sniff*

Okay, enough senti crap.

I’m bored. Save me.

—————-
Listening to: Matchbox Twenty – If You’re Gone

I haven’t posted ANYTHING here in ages. Not counting that password-protected post, of course — that one’s a totally different matter.

And, yeah. I’m bored. Nothing much is happening, anyway — it’s the same routine everyday. Wake up. Take a bath. Eat. Go to school. Go home. Do homework. Sleep. Repeat.

Gah. Anyway…

It’s achievement test week next week. Damn. I’m worried — they’re counted as long tests. I’m scared that I might fail Algebra, or get a low score in Chem. Or, hell, not answer anything for SS — our lectures didn’t dive into the details much. Damn. The tests are definitely objective, and that’s where I’m worried.

Anyway, I said I’ve had enough of my GC-ness. So there.

But, boredom aside, I’m actually rather happy.

I’m trying to keep my feet on the ground
I’m getting to like this feeling I’ve found
I’m getting to love the thought of having you around
And I will never let you down

Haha. It could be perfect, except that this song mostly applies to people who just hooked up with a new girl/boyfriend. And no, I don’t even have one. But hey, it perfectly expresses what I feel inside — happiness. Plus, it’s so lively. Great! ^_^

It’s the best way to end this week, I guess. And I’m glad it’s ending on a good note.

—————-
Listening to: The Verve Pipe – Never Let You Down

It’s Batch 2011’s stargazing today. Normally, I wouldn’t give a damn about their batch — I still don’t. But, yeah, I was fetched late today, so I still caught sight of them setting up their tents and stuff.

Which, unfortunately, brings a wave of nostalgia.

I was walking around with Estelle when we both remarked that we wanted to attend stargazing. I’m an Astrosoc member, so technically, I can go. Seeing as I don’t have a permit, I didn’t.

Anyway, we both remembered our stargazing last year. God. I missed stargazing. It was one of the best damn things that happened, despite the fact that I sort of lost my voice that day. There’s just something about looking up at the night sky with your friends and letting stars pass over you that’s so relaxing.

I want to do it again.

I want to lie down on the field and just… look at the stars. Look at how they twinkle and shine. The cold February weather helps too.

Sigh.

I promise, I’ll attend next year’s stargazing.